Hari abantu benshi baba mu rukundo ariko mu by’ukuri wareba ugasanga igihe cyari kigeze ko batandukana, buri umwe agakomeza ubuzima bwe. Urubuga Elcrema rwakusanyije ibimenyetso bigaragaza ko igihe kigeze ugafata umwanzuro wo gutandukana n’umukunzi wawe.
1. Nta cyizere ukigirira umukunzi wawe
Niba nta cyizere ukigira umukunzi wawe igihe kirageze ko mutandukana kuko icyizere ari ikintu cy’ingenzi gituma abakundana bagumana. Iyo nta cyizere gihari urukundo ntirushobora gushinga imizi.
2. Ntimubasha kumvikana ku bintu by’ingenzi mu buzima bwanyu
Niba utabasha kumvikana n’umukunzi wawe ku bintu by’ingenzi bireba ubuzima bwanyu, ni igihe cyo gutandukana nawe. Ibintu bijyanye n’umuryango,umutungo, idini bishobora kwangiza cyane umubano w’abakundana mu gihe batabyumva kimwe.
3. Ibishashi by’urukundo byarashize
Niba utakiyumvamo ibishashi by’urukundo ndetse ukanagerageza bikanga bivuze ko nta rukundo ruri hagati yanyu, nta n’impamvu yo kugumana.
4.Umukunzi wawe aracyakomeye ku mateka ye y’ahashize
Niba umukunzi wawe akomeye ku mateka ye ndetse akumva atayareka, nta mpamvu yo kugumana nawe. Urukundo nyarwo rwubakira ku mateka y’uyu munsi rugateganyiriza ejo hazaza.
5.Mugorwa no gukemura amakimbirane hagati yanyu
Nibyo koko nta rukundo rushobora kubura amakimbirane, ariko iyo iteka mudashobora kuyikemurira mugakenera umuhuza, igihe kirageze ngo ufate umwanzuro wo kubivamo kuko abakundana nyabyo babasha kwikemurira amakimbirane yavuka hagati yabo.
6.Wumva nta bwisanzure ahubwo umeze nk’ufungiranye
Niba udashobora kwisanzura ngo ugaragaze icyo utekereza, ni ikimenyetso ko mukwiye gutandukana. Iyo umuntu ari mu rukundo rw’ukuri abasha kugaragaza ibyiyumviro bye ntacyo yishisha.
7. Abo mubana bahora baguhangayikiye
Niba abantu muhorana bya hafi bahora bahangayitse kubera uburyo ubanye n’umukunzi wawe, bisobanuye ko igihe kigeze ugasuzuma imibanire yanyu byaba ngombwa ugafata icyemezo cyo gutandukana nawe. Akenshi iyo umuntu ari mu rukundo biragoye kumenya niba hari ikitagenda, inshuti n’umuryango nibo babanza kubibona.
8. Ntimukiganira uko bikwiye
Kimwe mu bimenyetso by’urukundo ruhagaze neza ni uguhana amakuru hagati y’abakundana, niba rero bidashoboka ko mugirana ikiganiro kirambuye kandi gikora ku mutima nta mpamvu n’imwe yatuma mugumana kuko mwaba muri guta umwanya.
9. Ubona atakigushyikira
Niba utekereza ko umukunzi wawe atagushyigikira mu byo ukora ndetse akenshi ukabona gahunda ze arizo zibanza imbere ; iki n’ikimenyetso ko urukundo rwanyu ruri mu marembera.
10. Arakubeshya
Igihe umukunzi wawe atakikubwiza ukuri, atakikubwira ibibazo yagize ngo musangire akabisi n’ agahiye akabishye n’akaryoshye aba akwereka ko atakigukeneye mu buzima bwe kuko umuntu mukundana akubona nk’ umujyanama we mukuru bigatuma agutura agahinda key aba yageze no ku nsinzi agashishikazwa no kubikubwira.
11.Ntabushake bwo gutera akabariro agira
Iyo umugabo wawe cyangwa umugore wawe atagishaka ko mutera akabariro, ugasanga iyo ngingo ntacyo imurebaho, wabimubwira akakureba nk’icyo imbwa ihaze, akakubwira ko yumva atameze neza mu gihe ubimusabye ko mutera akabariro, bishobora kuba ariyo nzira yahisemo yo kukwereka ko urukundo rwanyu rumeze nk’ igicaniro cyazimye.
12. .Kutaguhamagara
Mu kiri mu rukundo rwanyarwo yaguhamagaraga inshuro zitabarika, akakwandikira ubutuma bugufi ndetse rimwe na rimwe akakoherereza n’amagambo meza ajyanye n’urukundo ; amwe tuzi ku izina ry’imitoma. Ariko ubu ugasanga ni wowe wigora ukamuhamagara ngo ubashe kumva ijwi rye. Ugatangira ukibaza ngo ni iki cyabaye ? Nta kwirushya uzahita wibwira ko umutima we utakigutekereza habe na gato.
13. Gutinda ku kazi
Ese inshuti yawe y’umuhungu cyangwa y’umukobwa yaba ikubwira ko akazi kaba kayibanye kenshi ku buryo budakura mu ruge. Yego rimwe na rimwe yajyaga ku kazi agatindayo. Ariko ubu arapanga n’akazi kadashoboka ka nijoro kandi ntako agira.
Agatangira akakubwira ati, ‘njye sinkunda umunru ushaka kungendaho cyane ngo angenzure buri mwanya.’ Iki gihe uzahite ubona ko nta rukundo akigufitiye kuko hari izindi gahunda aba yigiriyemo zitandukanye nuko yaguha umwanya mukagira ibyo byinshi mugeraho.
14. Kwiyibagiza ibihe byiza mujya mugirana
Iyo umukunzi wawe ashaka ko urukundo rwanyu rujyaho akadomo yirinda ikintu cyose cyabagarira urukundo rwanyu. Ugasanga niba mwarajyaga musohokana nko muri wikendi ntibikibaho cyangwa se ntabwo umunsi mukuru nk’umunsi w’amavuko mukiwizihiza. Atangira akwereka ko nta bushake bwinshi akigufitiye kandi nta n’umwanya aba afite ; ndetse rimwe na rimwe akakubwira ko aba yabyibagiwe. Nubona ariko bimeze uzahite wibwira ko urukundo rwanyu ari hafi ya ntarwo.
15. Iyo nta byishimo akigira
Ugihura n’umukunzi wawe mu minsi ya mbere urukundo rwanyu mwasaga nkaho musigaye mwitwa ba Bwana na Madamu Byishimo ; ariko ubungubu musigaye murebana ay’ingwe ukibaza impavu ukayibura. Akaba yarajyaga agutungura ukabona aguhaye impano idasanzwe, ariko ubu ntakikwikoza. Niyo atashye aza ajya mu buriri nta kuvuga menshi kuko aba atakiri barimenshi. Ibi ni bimwe mu bintu bizakwerekako urukundo rwanyu ntarugihari, ari ugukura yo amaso.
